The Fruit of Her Hands Book Study–Chapter Seven (Part 2/3)

(To read part one of this three part series, click here.)


I remember Jon being so weary and discouraged at one point that it was nearly impossible for him to hide it. However, this particular day he came up to me with a big grin on his face saying, “get this, in Ecclesiastes after going through a long list of all that is vain, God says ‘enjoy life with your wife’!”   It was like being given a cold glass of water on a cruel, dry, hot day.  It is a mystery to me, but Lord knows how important it is for a man to find rest, refuge, comfort, and pleasure in his wife.

Nancy quoted Proverbs 5:18-19 to make essentially the same point, except she got little more explicit…

Let your fountain be blessed,
and rejoice in the wife of your youth,
a lovely deer, a graceful doe.
Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight;
be intoxicated always in her love.” (ESV)

She notes how God commands the man to rejoice in his wife, sexually.  Have you ever felt, in regards to making love to your husband, a sense of simply complying with your duty? More like an inconvenience, or a time-consuming task?  For us, it is all in the mind, isn’t it?  Though the command is to the men, we sure can make it difficult for them to find it rejoicing. Nancy suggests a view adjustment is in order and constantly remembering to take time thinking and preparing the garden so that you and your hubby can rejoice in each other‘s bodies.

The next command to a husband is “to let her breasts fill you at all times with delight.”  Nancy also inserts here a proper and needed admonition for modesty.  Your breasts are only for your husband to see and delight in…don’t be a nuisance to other men and not cover them up.  Period.  Now, the question is, Nancy asks, “how are they to let their wives’ breasts satisfy them at all times if they can never get near them?”  You know the answer; make it easy for them to obey this command and stop playing hard to get.

Now, final point, Nancy wants us to consider what it means to enrapture your husband with your love.   To enrapture means “to fill with intense delight.”  Nancy quotes a friend of hers who pictures it this way, “a husband who is so completely sexually satisfied by his wife that he is like a wet noodle. He is not strung up tight, sexually, because of a feeble sexual relationship, but is married to a woman who makes it her objective to delight and enrapture him all the time.” How do you do this, you may ask?  She wisely suggests asking our husbands.

I have been married for 12 years and I can certainly agree with Nancy on all this.  However, I would say that this type of enrapture in the marriage bed takes time to cultivate and be comfortable with as a woman.  It may seem overwhelming to obey at first. But if I can encourage you to not merely think of sexual acts where ecstasies are the ultimate goal, but rather as John Piper beautifully puts it:

“Just as the heavens are telling the glory of God’s power and beauty, so sexual climax is telling the glory of immeasurable delights that we will have with Christ in the age to come.”¹

This pleasure, this enrapture is good, but the best part is still incomprehensible to us now.  Let us live in faith and believe that even this points to an inconceivable life with Jesus in the age to come.  That, my friends, ought to free us and get us rejoicing… 😉

Tomorrow I’ll end this chapter by addressing “Overcoming Hindrances.”  Talk to ya then!


¹“This Momentary Marriage” by John Piper, pg. 128


  1. Well done…
    Long ago I realized by being a helper suitable to him means many things. Ladies, one way to help our husbands with purity in their minds and hearts is to HELP fill their sexual desires. Then they don’t turn to pornography, or even affairs to get their pleasure. I also learned through communication to my husband that where I might think of it little, his thoughts are quite captured by the DELIGHT in sexual contact. So I encourage you all to give lots of thought on the matter and not to be ashamed of God’d gift in marriage…

  2. Liz Roeder says:

    Gina, good advice. I think of the verse in 1Corinthians 7:4-5 where Paul states, the wife does not have authority over her body, but the husband does, and likewise, also the husband does not have authority over his body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another except by agreement for a time so that you may devote yourselves to prayer and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

    Ladies, don’t deprive your husbands so that they are tempted to look elsewhere. Let them be delighted in you!


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